Just that moment, I felt comforting warmth. How foolish I was back then as I neglected the voice. I thought it was just my conscience telling me to be calm.
That would make me nuts?! Talking to myself that way…
But then again, it was that ignorance that eventually led me to believe.
To my surprise I was calm. Look at the situation at hand, me, a 21 year old with a stroke and yet..
I could laugh and joke with the medical attendants. I finally kept my mouth shut in the ambulance when the attendant pulled out a tube and said it will be inserted INSIDE, yes INSIDE my penis! To make things worse it was a she and she was on training.
“So is this the first time you’re touching a male penis?” I asked.
Her other colleague was laughing hysterically but she just stared at me in disbelief.
She consulted her superior, “When do I stop inserting?”
Now is a good time
“Until you get to the bladder wall where there will be obstruction” he replied.
It eventually got to the wall and I knew it because there was an undeniable pain.
And so that was my first experience with the catheter. Little did I know that it hurts the most when it is pulled out!
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Friday, May 8, 2009
Finally!
The ambulance arrival was pretty obvious when the distinguishing siren was blared.
It was about time! My head is (literally!) killing me!
Apparently, while she was busy attending to me, the front gate was still locked. Even the front door was shut. The attendants thought that this was a prank and almost left but she got to them in time.
I was then lifted up via stretcher and then carried down to the front of the car porch where the ambulance was parked. At that moment, I closed my eyes and prayed.
Lord, I don’t know what is happening to me. Am I going to die?
And then for the first time in my life, my 21 years of good life, I heard Him. Initially I thought it was just my subconscious mind comforting me. But, this wasn’t my voice and oh how comforting this voice was. This warmth just came onto me. I checked to see if another blanket was put on me but there was none.
The voice said this..
This is not the end of you…
It was about time! My head is (literally!) killing me!
Apparently, while she was busy attending to me, the front gate was still locked. Even the front door was shut. The attendants thought that this was a prank and almost left but she got to them in time.
I was then lifted up via stretcher and then carried down to the front of the car porch where the ambulance was parked. At that moment, I closed my eyes and prayed.
Lord, I don’t know what is happening to me. Am I going to die?
And then for the first time in my life, my 21 years of good life, I heard Him. Initially I thought it was just my subconscious mind comforting me. But, this wasn’t my voice and oh how comforting this voice was. This warmth just came onto me. I checked to see if another blanket was put on me but there was none.
The voice said this..
This is not the end of you…
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Hello...
“Dear God. What is going on with me?”
... nothing...
“Hello? Are you there?”
...again..nothing..
Allow me to add that at that time, my relationship with God was unilateral. I prayed, at times I got what I wanted and at times I also did not get what I asked for. I told myself, “Not my luck” and moved on. Thankfully, this was all going to change.
I called my father to tell him that I can’t wake up. He instantly thought that this was another of my pranks and there was no way he’s going to fall far it this time. Naturally, I got this response from him.
“Get up from bed and go to work!”
If only I could, papa.. If only I could. Till this day I don’t blame him for seeing things that way because I was quite the prankster back then. Aesop’s “ The Boy Who Cried Wolf” is a great analogy to further explain this situation.
That morning I cried out but no one came because… simply because I used to cry Wolf!
... nothing...
“Hello? Are you there?”
...again..nothing..
Allow me to add that at that time, my relationship with God was unilateral. I prayed, at times I got what I wanted and at times I also did not get what I asked for. I told myself, “Not my luck” and moved on. Thankfully, this was all going to change.
I called my father to tell him that I can’t wake up. He instantly thought that this was another of my pranks and there was no way he’s going to fall far it this time. Naturally, I got this response from him.
“Get up from bed and go to work!”
If only I could, papa.. If only I could. Till this day I don’t blame him for seeing things that way because I was quite the prankster back then. Aesop’s “ The Boy Who Cried Wolf” is a great analogy to further explain this situation.
That morning I cried out but no one came because… simply because I used to cry Wolf!
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